Day 3: It's Not Always My Fault

Every day some kid calls me a jerk. Sometimes a kid calls me a jerk like today because I accidentally hit him with my backpack, but I didn't see him...I heard the bell ring for lunch and jumped out of my seat so I could get to the library right away to get one of the computers before they were all taken and when I swung around, the kid was there. Of course, he yelled at me so everyone heard, and the teacher made me sit down for being rude...and so of course I got to the library late...that was okay, though, because the librarian sometimes talks with me and today she let me put books back on the shelves for her...until I forgot that they had to be in order by the number, not just the author's name...and then she got frustrated with me because she says I don't pay attention to details (Friend & Bursuck, p. 282).

At least today wasn't as bad as yesterday. When the counselor, Mrs. Bright, showed mom that graph with all the bars and said that the bars showed all the classes and how much I am failing, I felt like a real jerk then (Collins, p. xii). Mom didn't get mad, though...she told Mrs. Bright about this diary thing I'm doing and some other things that Dr. Baker is doing. Mrs. Bright didn't seem too interested...she doesn't think I can change, I can tell. I hope I can change. I don't like feeling like a jerk. And I don't think I'm really that dumb like some kids think; some stuff in school is really fun like when we got to do reports on marine life. I can tell you everything there is to know about elephant seals, and that's cool, because most kids can only tell you that elephant seals are big and ugly. Dr. Baker says that my elephant seal report shows that I just don't learn the way that some teachers teach and that I might be able to teach the teachers some things (Collins, p. 27). He told my mom that some teachers do what he called "ability profiling," and I heard him tell her that it means that some teachers won't give me a chance. He was just talking to my mom then, and I was in the hall waiting, but I heard and remembered what he said...I liked what he said because it made me feel like it isn't always my fault when I get in trouble...some teachers just think I choose to forget and to be messy and not write like they want me to (Collins, p. 26).